Thursday, August 12, 2010

Not the Baby Anymore

As I watch a few of my friends getting ready to adopt their daughters, I am reminded of my feelings that I had right before we left to go get Faith.  I was SO scared of what adding a younger sibling to the family was going to do to the current "baby", my Shelby baby.  I just knew that she was going to be very jealous and I really thought she might regress in our attachment process that we had worked so hard at.  I thought that her trust in me would waiver and that we would all have to prove to her again that we STILL loved her even though there was now a new baby in the family.

Boy, was I wrong!  From the very minute that we received Faith, Shelby has done nothing but LOVE love love her baby sister. I know it sounds too good to be true, but it is the truth.  Something changed in Shelby that day.  Something very wonderful changed in Shelby's heart that day unexpectedly...

It made her a better person!

Not that my Shelby was a "bad" person to begin with; however, she was a self centered, selfish, tantrum throwing, jealous little girl before we added Faith to the mix.  She only wanted mommy to do everything for her, her brothers were second best, and her daddy-well he would do only if he was last option.  Once Faith arrived, it seemed as if Shelby just released all those negative traits.  (Now I am sure some of those traits she came by honestly from her traumatic history) Just once she met Faith and realized that she had someone she was supposed to "take care of and love", she seemed to let go of all her selfishness and distrust of us.  All of a sudden, her Daddy was cool, her brothers were alot of fun, and mommy, well she was always going to be there to love her anytime she needed it.

It was definitely an unexpected blessing that only God could provide. Who would have thought that "replacing" the baby in the family would have been such a wonderful and easy transition for the current baby in the family??! 

So to all of you mommies out there who are worried about how your current child is going to feel about not being the baby anymore...I say watch out, because it just might make them a better person  :)  A more beautiful person than you could have ever imagined...

4 comments:

Everything Beautiful Shay said...

Great post and certainly what I am praying for!!! So excited!!!

Anonymous said...

It is very interesting for me to read that post. Thanks for it. I like such topics and everything that is connected to them. I would like to read more soon.

Kate Swenson

La Dolce Vita: The Sweet Life said...

That is great! We totally believe that being a big sister will be a great thing for Sophie. Can't wait!

Beth and Ryan said...

Thank you for the encouragement. Hoping our girls will be as close as our boys! MK talks about her sister in China EVERYDAY!