Only 2 Months Ago

I received one of the greatest gifts in the world...

Look how scared she was :( Poor little one. Now that we know her moods and expressions, you can really see the fear in her face. She must have been terrified and confused and as Shelby would say, "My baby is not happy."

But oh what a transition my baby girl has made in only 2 months! We definately have a HAPPY BABY girl now!!

The Invisible Mom

I received this from a friend and wanted to share. This is to all those Moms, who feel or have felt unappreciated. God is watching you!

The Invisible Mom author unknown

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?' Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more. Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this??

Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, she's gone!

One night a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England .. She had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when my friend turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe ..

I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given i t to me until I read her inscription: 'To my friend, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.

'In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pat tern my work: No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.

A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof, no one will ever see it. And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.

'I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will be come.

'At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride.I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home.

And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, 'You're gonna love it there.'As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.

China Raises Fines on One-Child Policy

Beijing, China (LifeNews.com) -- Chinese officials have followed through on their earlier promise to raise the fines for couples who violate the one-child population control policy. Poorer residents who are subject to human rights abuses have long complained that rich Chinese couples can pay fines and avoid governmental harassment.

Now, the Chinese government has raised those fines to discourage more families from having a second child, which violates the one-child rule that has earned the Asian nation condemnation from around the world. Deng Xingzhou, director of Beijing’s family planning commission, said the new rules were aimed at correcting that wealth disparity.

Currently, couples must pay a fine that amounts to three to eight times their annual salary and that amount will increase although the government didn't appear to release official figures.The increased fines also come as the nation's capital, Beijing, has experienced a rise in its population due to the influx of migrant workers from the coast. The city has a population of 17 million, well over the 10-11 million who live in New York City, the largest American city.

Heavy fines have also been customary for poorer Chinese residents and Chinese population control officials will fine the Chinese people for violations to such a heavy price that they may not be able to afford it.

Some of the citizens of Bobai county in the southwestern portion of China protested in 2007 and said fines were instituted even on people who had already paid them.

Forced abortions were done on some of the women. Police eventually arrested 28 people in association with the riots, according to official Chinese media sources.

Similar high fine initiatives have been adopted in Henan and Zhejiang provinces where the incidence of female infanticides is at their highest because of the cultural preference for boys.

The policy has resulted in epidemics of forced abortions and sterilizations and human rights abuses ranging from job loss and imprisonment to house arrest and threatening family members.

Baby Giggles

or maybe baby torture?!?!? Oh how I just love her little laugh!!

Thoughts from a Korean-Adoptee

Here are a few of the items that were listed under this woman's article titled below. She was adopted from Korea many years ago and hear are some of her thoughts below. She also wrote another article that I found intriguing as well, click here for that one.

Twenty-Three Things This Korean-Adoptee Thought About as a Child

1. That many times I was embarrassed and ashamed of my birth culture because it was so profoundly different than that of my family and my friends. That too often it served as an easy and irresistible source of teasing and fodder for others - strangers and classmates alike.
2. That instead of always hearing, "You're so lucky to be adopted", that it would have been nice to just once hear "It must be hard sometimes to be adopted."
3. That the insatiable need for me to be perfect was a way to make me feel more valuable, and therefore less likely to be abandoned once again.
4. That the insatiable need for me to control every facet of my environment was a way to feel safe and secure during a time when I felt that I was disposable.
5. That my mind understood why my Korean mother had to give me up, but that my heart didn't.
6. That the message "She loved you so much that she gave you up for a better life" meant that it was sometimes scary to be loved so intensely by my adoptive parents.
7. That I dreamed of going back to Korea just to be able to fit in amongst my peers.
8. That I would have given anything to just once be the girl who was thought of as being popular, pretty and "normal", instead of the one whose sole appearance brought forth so many unwanted questions and assumptions.
9. That often I thought of ways I could make myself look more white, just so I wouldn't feel like such a monster.
10. That I felt so incredibly guilty anytime I felt anything sad or bad about my adoption. That it was much better to hold everything in than to hurt my parents who I know loved and adored me more than life itself.
11. That it was impossible to be angry or hateful towards my Korean parents for leaving me, and yet impossible to forgive myself for being left.
12. That I got to a point where my mind truly believed everything I was saying about not feeling any effects or fallout from being adopted, even if my heart and body felt markedly different.
13. That my tantrums, outbursts and fits of rage were my way of trying to say, "I'm hurting so badly inside and more than anything, I am afraid that you will leave me."
14. That love, no matter how deep nor abundant, can ever erase the past.
15. That what others saw in myself would one day be evident to me as well. And hopefully one day, with God's grace, I would truly learn to love and forgive myself.

OCD Dishwasher

Ok, Faith really doesn't have OCD (I don't think), but she does have an obsession of emptying things out. She will clean off a coffee table in a flash one piece at a time. She will empty out a bucket of toys one toy at a time. If you give her a cup of Cheerios, yep one at a time they will be taken out of the cup. So needless to say you can see where this is going with the dishwasher...




She sees a bucket full of silverware just staring her in the face NEEDING to be emptied! So without fail everytime I open the dishwasher-she is there in a flash with her empting abilities ready to go! One piece at a time comes out of the container. Sounds great right? A one year old already trained to do the dishes. Well that sounds great in theory, but guess what you are supposed to do next...LOAD the dishwasher!!

Never a pretty sight as she sees a completely full container of "needing-to-be-emptied-out-immediately-silverware" dissappearing slowly if front of her as the door closes so tightly from her little finger tips ;)

Boys First Concert

Look where we get go on Sunday...Winter Jam 2009!! We are very excited as this will be the boys' first real concert. We will even get to see our adoption buddies the Nolan's there at the concert as Tony is the Guest Speaker :)

Tammy and Tony were just matched with a beautiful little girl and I am thrilled to see them finally get to go to China to get her. I paperchased with the Nolan's back when I chased for Shelby. They have waited a long long time, and now their little girl, Joy, has finally found her mommy and daddy!

Looking forward to a fun day that will be spent with "just the boys". I have 3 AMAZING males in my life and enjoy every minute spent with them. (The girls will get to hang out with their Nana so I suspect they won't miss us for a minute.) Caleb and Travis need some time alone with just mom and dad too since the spotlight has recently just been on the girls. They are both awesome big brothers and they have been so great with the girls and all the ordeals of bringing them home. It is time they get a little time for themselves ;)

Back to Work for Real

Yes, that is right I had to go back to work for real today. Meaning no more days off, half days off, dr appts, etc. Just back to plain old real work full-time today. For those of you out there who don't think I really work I thought I would post a couple of pics of my Real office. Oh and of course I threw in a pic or 2 of all of my employee of year awards just to prove that I really do WORK!

Here is a shot of my cutie patootie with her "Oh my goodness you are really going back to work for real look!" Boy am I going to miss her during the days. However, I know her Nana is really going to enjoy her though :)

Never Know

We went to the FCCA Waiting group Chinese New Year dinner last night at a restaurant. I really enjoy going to these events every 3 months or so since it is a great way to meet new people. You never know who is going to show up and that is what I enjoy! Since I love to tell my adoption stories, I am always on the prowl for some poor unfortunate couple to sucker into listening to me tell them about how lucky I am to have found my "special needs" daughters. Anyway, last night was no different as I met 2 new couples who got to hear the Straight story :)

Well the weirdest part was that I got to share my story with a girlfriend that I haven't seen in almost 2o years!! Gwen and I went to high school together and we also used to work at Burger King together for several years. It was totally cool to see her again especially since she is about to travel to China for her daughter in about a month. Even stranger is that she will be traveling with my good friend Amy to China also. How cool is that?! I hope to see Gwen again this Friday at our Adoption Option meeting and can't wait to introduce her to all of other adoption buddies :0)

New Blog Topics

Shifting gears these days and have started reading more and more blogs about adult adoptees and their experiences growing up. Rumor Queen posted a lot about these recently as you can see here in her recent posts:

Writings of Adult Adoptees Series
1. The Writings of Adult Adoptees - Tai Dong Huai
2. Adult Adoptee Book Recommendations
3. Adult Adoptee Articles from InformedAdoption.com
4. Adult Adoptee Writings from Anti Racist Parent
5. Adult Adoptee Blogs - Harlow’s Monkey
6. More from Adult Adoptees - Adoption Survivor
7. Adult Adoptee Writings - Going back

I want to learn as much as I can about how to raise my children (ALL my children) the best way possible. I think learning from others who have walked in their similar shoes is a very smart way to begin to do that. As my dad always said...Knowledge is Power! I hope to gain a lot of knowledge in the area of transracial parenting so that I can be the best mom I can be :)

Tough To Watch

After watching this video I had to post it on the blog. It is very difficult to watch as I sit in my chair with my heat blowing on my cold feet, my hot chocolate in my cup, and my many choices of food that I have to pick for breakfast this morning. Priorities in life will hopefully shift just a little after watching. Click here to watch it. Yes, it is tough to watch...but the really tough part is what you do differently in your life after watching it.

If you get the urge to sponsor a child that needs your help, click here for more information. This little one needs your help today. Help is only a few clicks and credit card away from giving her a home and arms to hold her. Do something different today!

Year of the Ox

Here are some pics of us celebrating Chinese New Year this past weekend with some friends. We met for Chinese (of course) and then went over the the FCCA Celebration at the Civic Center. It was really neat seeing all these beautiful children dressed in their Chinese attire. I even wore my new XXXXLarge shirt that I recently bought in China. Aren't we all just cute as pie?!

Looking Up

Well my little Faith is feeling much much better! We went back to the urgent care thing on Sunday for a second round of the antibiotic shot. Then yesterday once my pediatrician received the reports from urgent care, he called and insisted I bring her to him. So once again I had to take off a half day and took her to our pediatrician. The good news is that her lungs sound much better and the fever is gone. Also after the extensive review of her lung xrays, it was decided that the "cloudy" parts on the x-ray did have something to do with her heart surgery. So she more than likely doesn't have pneumonia near as bad as first indicated. So next time she gets a chest xray we will have something to compare it to. Let's just hope she doesn't need another one anytime soon!


Anyway, she is doing better but there is still some questions about her bladder infections and they are working on getting some answers for that. I was very concerned about Melamine issues, but my pediatrician assured me that this is not related. However, if we do more test it will be a kidney ultrasound and at that point I will feel better about being certain if Melamine exposure is a true concern or not. Oh and all of her rashes are much better today. We are making great improvements.

One good thing out of this sickness has been the fact that Faith really seems to like me more :) I know she always "liked" me but now she has made some great strides in the attachment department. She actually cries now when I leave her to go to work!! (I know that sounds like a weird thing for a mommy to be happy about, but if you are an adoptive mom then you understand.) Faith also follows me around the house now from room to room. This morning she camped out in the bathroom the whole time I was in the shower- yeah! Again, I know weird as these are the things that "new mommies" wish their children wouldn't do.

I can so remember when the boys were little or when Shelby came home for that matter, that if I could only take a shower by myself how wonderful that would be. Anyway Faith is different as she hasn't cared up until now where I was. So I feel like she has made a big leap of faith (no pun intended) in putting her trust in her mommy now-YEAH!!

Neat Blog I Enjoy

This is for my Weight W@tchers buddies out there. Here is a great blog that I follow that has some good stuff on it often. She calls herself thewwchick !

Sick Little One

Unfortunately I spent yesterday afternoon at the urgent care center with Faith. With really no early symptoms, Faith came down with fever when we got home from the FCCA New Year Celebration event. Well she felt really hot so I decided I would take her temperature since she has never run a fever and I don't have a good "mommy feel thermometer" on her yet. Needless to say when I took her temp with the first thermometer I thought it was broken since it said 105!! That was with an old fashion one, so I went and got a digital one and took it under her arm and it read 104.2 BEFORE you add one?!?!? I have never seen a child run such a high temp and of course with all her weird rashes, I was freaking out.

I threw her in the car and took Shelby to my moms since CJ and the boys were out fishing. We were off to the nearest immediate care doctor. When we arrived they immediately took her back and with their forehead thermometer she registered 104.2 and her heart rate was 185! After lots of tests, a breathing treatment, motrin, and an antibiotic shot, we left with the diagnosis of a urinary tract infection and bronchitis and pneumonia :( Crazy how she was acting just fine and went from 60 to zero in such a short time.

It was quite scary to see her like that as she was completely lethargic by the time we arrived to the doctor. She just layed there and whimpered. She normally fights like a bull when a doctor is working on her. For all of her tests (and they were not fun ones) all she did was lay there and look at me with her pitiful eyes whining softly, so sad.

My sister Sheila came to the Faith rescue at the doctor office and Faith started to perk up alot. Now Sheila would say it was because of her presence, but I am pretty sure it was the shot and the Motrin ;) Anyway by the time we left, we had our old Faith back smiling and playing peek a boo. We go back again today for another shot and hope to get this stuff knocked out soon. My poor little girl seems to get rid of one problem and then just pops up more. We need to get her completely well and feeling better soon. Please put her in your prayers that she gets WELL and gets all the proper treatment her little body needs.

Foodie Talk

I haven't updated in a while about little Miss Faith's eating habits (or lack of). We have been working with her to add new and exciting foods to her diet ever since we got her. Unfortunately, she still is very picky and choosy about what she puts into her mouth. However, she will now eat applesauce (on occassion), baby cereal (on occassion), baby food (every now and then), cheerios (on occassion), oh and of course cookies and graham crackers (every chance she gets!).

I was so desperate the other night to get her to eat something, I dug out a jar of baby food that we received as our airplane baby meal for Faith on the flight home from Japan. Yes, it does say "Cod Fish & Vegetables in Radish Sauce". Sounds really yummy doesn' t it?!? Well hey a mom was desperate ya know. So guess what- she ate it! Well she didn't eat the whole jar, but she did eat several bites. Talk about some stinky stuff-yuck.

Anyway, I thought I would share some new pics of Faith adventuring out and enjoying one of her favorites-Brusters Ice Cream. At least I know she isn't completely crazy and she is one of us. No Straight can resist the temptations of ice cream ;)

Plumber's Butt

Or maybe this is just diaper butt?! :)

Look Who is Walking

Well sort of ;) We can officially say she has taken her first steps! She is so proud of herself when she does it. Too cute!

Catching Up

• Faith is 18 months old now
• Shelby is STILL a great big sister
• We had Travis' birthday party at the skating rink
• We had a terrific birthday party
• Faith really enjoyed opening all of Travis' presents
• Really she just liked eating all the tissue paper ;)
• Faith has been dealing with lots of skin rash issues
• First issue was a skin infection that causes lession like sores on her body-yuck I know
• Second issue is now that she has lots of spots all over her face
• We have no idea what is causing the spots on her face as they started before we even started her on the skin infection antibiotic
• We don't think the 2 are related
• I am now thinking she may be allergic to milk in the milk based formula
• Switching to Soy formula tonight, so we will have to wait and see
• I took the kids to Chuck E Cheese on Travis' actual birthday
• Fun had by all and this was Faith's first of many visits to come
• We went to Kennesaw state courtesy of Sheridan to their Chinese New Year Celebration
• Frannie went with us too, it was neat but the girls tired out and we wound up at Panda Express for a quick Chinese dinner
• We have been enjoying lots of playdates with friends

We have another playdate tomorrow

I have 2 adorable Chinese daughters!

A teenager checking me out at the grocery store said to her bagging friend, "Look they are just like the little dolls!"- Is that a racist comment?!

I personally think they are WAY better than the dolls :)

Chinese Lesson

I just had to post this video from my friend Lucy who just adopted their 4th daughter, Alaina. Alaina (or I guess I should say Wu Xu Hui) is one smart cookie!! She decided in China that her new mommy and daddy should learn Chinese instead of her having to learn English. Hey makes sense to me :)

After you watch the hilarious video of her trying to teach her mom and dad just how to say her name correctly, you can see why Alaina has given up and decided that the ENTIRE English language will be much much easier :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5IQySUwriY

You always hear the "bad stuff" about older child adoptions, so I just had to post this to show that there obviously is lots of good stuff too!

Birthday Boy

My baby boy turned SIX years old today! Let's see, what is the best way to describe my little one?? Wll let's just say Travis is a mess!! My mess and I love him dearly. Oh how boring the Straights would be without our little Travis treasure!

Happy Birthday baby boy! You are my favorite Travis in the whole wide world :)

I Can't Possibly Imagine Their Pain

Abby was adopted from Guatemala. At three years old, she was diagnosed with a high-risk, aggressive form of Leukemia. Certain genetic complications have put her chance of surviving the treatment at about 20%.I am praying for her and her family. Would you pray for them too? You can find more about Abby here, on her family blog: http://www.riggsfamilyblog.com

Nana Fix

Faith has been getting Nanatized the last couple of days! My mom finally got her hands on her on Monday when I went back to work for a few hours. Then tonight my mom got her again tonight. We took the boys to the movies tonight as I won free tickets the other day. We had a great time (even though it was a dog movie-but a good one) at the movies, and Faith and Shelby had a great time with their Nana!

Faith has warmed up to Nana these days as she just cracks up when Nana does that crazy laugh at her. Faith hams it up and does it right back. Shelby is even sharing Nana without any troubles so far. Now if we could only get Faith to just try some of those chicken and dumplins, I know she would be hooked for life ;)

Peek A Boo

Faith's new favorite game is Peek A Boo. She loves it and it never ceases to amaze her that she "reappears" every time! She is so stinkin cute :)

Unattended Toddler

Tissue Anyone??

Faith Fix

Ok now let's just talk about how much my sister has "attached" to little Miss Faith. I have seen my sister more in the last few weeks we have been home than I normally do in 6 months! And you know what...I don't think she is coming to visit ME?!

Faith has definately found a special place in Sheila's heart since she came into our lives. Sheila has to get her Faith Fix at least every couple of days. Funny thing is that Faith clearly remembers who she is and greets her with the same "tickle me under my chin grin" every time she sees her. By the way, Sheila is the only one who gets this special greeting anymore. Glad to see that Faith enjoys these special Faith Fixes just as much as Sheila does :)

A Little Souvenir

Baby Faith brought us home a smuggled in souvenir from China...Giardia! YUCK :( I hear this is pretty common in China adoptees considering the water pollution in China. Fortunately Faith doesn't seem to have any symptoms. The doctor just ran some tests and she came back positive.We are starting our antibiotics to send these little pests far far away :)

Rub a Dub Dub

Faith's favorite activity of the day!!

Now this is what I call a sink full...sink full of FUN :)

Heart Moments

I have had an awesome incredible day today with my baby girl, Faith! You see we spent the morning at the cardiologist today. She screamed her head off with each poke and prod they did to her. They started with an EKG. And then of course as she kicked and kicked to get that oxygen tester thingy off her toe. Then she was really ticked off as we moved into the echocardiogram room!

They put that cold jelly all over her little chest and her belly and she was NOT happy. After 30 minutes on the exam table, lots of jelly, lots of cookies, a little bottle, and 3 doctors looking at her heart... SHE IS PERFECT!!

That's right, her little heart was completely repaired in China. No worries, no restrictions, no problems with her heart any more! Absolutely amazing! This can only be a God thing if you ask me. My little baby girl was truly a leap of faith for our family. We did not know a lot about "heart babies" when we started this adoption. However, through lots of prayer and a lot of FAITH in God, we knew this little girl was our gift directly from Heaven.

I was so overwhelmed today with the good news, that I actually lost it in the elevator going out to the car with my HEALTHY baby girl. I guess my heart has been a little guarded this time around, not really sure of what her future held. However, today lots of emotions came flooding in as I finally felt secure in the fact that she is going to be OK and live a happy healthy life with us forever! Truly some heart moments today...For me and for Faith :)

Megan has her family

Congratulations to Debbie and Mike as they finally have their new baby girl in their lives! They live in the neighborhood right behind me and have waited in line for 3 years to finally get their little one from China. I can't wait to meet her! I am sure Megan and Faith will be great playmates for each other. Little Megan is from the same province my Shelby is from. It is neat to watch them in Nanning staying at the same hotel we stayed at. Looking forward to getting our girls together soon!!

Adoption Option Recap

We had a terrific time showing off our newest addition on the first Friday at our Adoption Option Group! There were lots of folks there and it is always a wonderful way to get together and share our stories about our adoptions. One definate fact always rings true...ALL adoptions are different. Just like ALL kids are different, so is the adoption experience. I am so glad that we have the opportunity to share our stories with each other and to help others who are still in the process of bringing home their new little ones.

Amy and Heather were there announcing their new referrals of the next babies to come home! LynnMarie will be first and then Max will be here. I just love watching new babies come home to their forever families :)

Random Pics

We had some playdates and keep having a lot of fun. Here are some pics for your enjoyment!

Happy New Year

HAPPY NEW YEAR! HAVE A WONDERFUL 2009!!